RESUME

I give everything I have when I’m doing something with love for others. And I don’t just mean romantic love — I mean love for the impact my work can have, love for the people I’m working with, and love for the values you believe in. 

I used to think that giving everything for something I love was a bad trait. Now, I don’t see it that way anymore. I just want to know whether what I’m giving is worth it — and that, to me, is a form of self-love. At this point, I think I’ve made enough mistakes to know what’s worth giving everything for, and what’s not.

I have many weaknesses, but the one that’s affected me the most is "thinking too much". I am not even saying it to impress employers. I tend to do that a lot. (Please help. Haha.)

And it is tied to other issues: being a perfectionist, not loving myself enough, fearing I’m not good enough. I struggle with staying consistent, especially when things don’t feel meaningful, or when I start doubting myself. A lot of it has roots in how I was raised — you know, Asian family things. :v And I’m not blaming anyone, but when life gets really hard, it’s not easy to keep going, even with the things you love.

But it is also tied to a lot of good things too: having high standards, seeing connection in small things, knowing how a single word can make a difference. I don't think being a perfectionist is totally a bad thing. You can be a perfectionist because you want to do your best or express yourself your best. You can be also a perfectionist because you fear failure or you're afraid you're not enough. it's a thin line, you know. 

So here’s what I’ve been doing to overcome it:

• I’m learning to love myself, a little more every day.

• I stay close to the people who believe in me and expand what I think I can be.

• I remind myself that I am enough, as long as I hold onto my values.

• I choose work that I genuinely love and find meaningful.

• I am prioritizing doing things that give me the freedom to do other things — like looking for a high-paying job, because let’s be real. :v

• I am trusting the universe more, and stopped trying to control things that are beyond my reach.

• And I am trying to become better — just a little — each day.

• But most importantly, I am letting "love" lead me, not fear.

The biggest challenges in my life have always been personal ones. I think most of the life-defining challenges we face in our careers are also personal ones. It is always about who we are, and it is not something we can overcome overnight. 

While I do not want to share you the personal challenges I've faced, I can tell you how I've survived through them. I survived through them with hope, love from others, love for others, and love for myself. And it is very important to remember that ego and self-love are not the same things, and that they are in fact total opposites.

And if you're ever going through a life-defining challenge, I wish you the best of luck from the bottom of my heart.

I honestly have no idea. 5 years ago, I never thought I would be living in Thailand with my friends looking for a job. Fate is a very strange thing. While I do not leave everything up to fate, sometimes you can't help but accept it. The only thing I can say is that I will be trying my best to stand by the values I believe in—may they grow even stronger a thousandfold.